Sunday, August 26, 2007

The Community of Believers

"... a sense of brotherhood and community is not derived from the actions and attitudes of others toward us, but our actions and attitudes toward them. As we imitate this approach to other believers, we will form cords of love not quickly broken."
~Beth Moore

~It seems like attitude can change just about any situation. I have such a hard time with this, I kind of adopt a "feeling," and then I am stuck for awhile. For instance, I don't like going to church.

I didn't say I don't like church, or anything about church, I just don't like the act of going there.
I think this is because, first of all, growing up, Sundays were relax at home days for me, or play with friends, I didn't go to church, it was like a "free day" of the week. So I've had a hard time changing my mindset about Sundays, getting up and going like it's a busy day of the week.

Well, I worry that somehow this unspoken feeling of mine, or maybe my attitude about church is rubbing off on my kids, because they never want to go, I have to drag them to get dressed, eat breakfast, get out the door, etc. They walk slowly down the halls, and cry when they go in their class.

Secondly, I have an attitude about the people though, which again I need to change. I instantly feel "judged" when people realize that I have three kids. I feel like as soon as someone knows that someone my age has three kids, they are weirded out. So my guard is already up before I even begin to interact with people. I'm in and out, and I feel like they are thinking, "there goes that young mom with three kids again...." And that somehow, being young makes me inadequate or something. Again, all my perception. I just keep my head down, and keep walking...

After reading this quote in my bible study, it hit me, maybe they aren't thinking those things, maybe they are thinking, "why doesn't she want to talk to anyone?" And even if they are thinking those things, who cares? Wouldn't my attitude toward them matter more, and possibly change the way they are feeling or thinking?

I am going to try to change my attitude about church, about people, and stop assuming what they are thinking and saying, and try to be friendlier, and hopefully it will rub off on my kids.



Blogger sarah chia said...

I'm with ya on the relaxing on Sunday part. We went to church last night, and it's great to be here on Sunday at noon still in PJs!

Still, I think you're doing a good thing to step beyond your first assumptions to build a community around you. That can often be hard, so I commend you for your desire to do so.

12:45 PM

Blogger kddub said...

Saturday night church, what a good idea!

Thanks, and today, I told my boys "we are going to make some friends at church today!" and it helped. We all talked about how we liked church on the way there, and they walked right into their class with no tears.
(it could've been the positive talk or that I bribed them with mentos)

2:56 PM

Anonymous kricketd said...

Mentos, Yuck, it must have been the positive talk. Now if it were chocolate, that could be a bribe.
But on a serious note, we've talked before about the constant dialog I have in my head. (Wait that sounds like I'm crazy, but you said I wasn't.) I have to replace the lies ( I think from Satan, because they are not good things to be thinking) with the truth. Those people haven't said any of the things I'm thinking, maybe they are thinking them, but that's their bad. I have to constantly replace the lies with the truth. It is an attitude thing. Phil preached a GREAT sermon today about devouring the word. Part of that is replacing the lies with the Word. Matt just said by doing that it restores your trust and relieves you of the burden of believing the lie. I hadn't thought of it that way but it is true. My plan is to try to devour the Word. My prayer is that I hunger for it the way I hunger for chocolate.
Love you!

4:00 PM

Blogger Larissa said...

this is an awesome post, kristin! i think almost everyone can relate to what you're saying.
i think trying not to feel judged- or thinking that someone is thinking something that i have no reason to believe, is what i can relate to most with you. it's tough.... keep us posted how it works and how you're doing with it! it's awesome to hear other people sharing in similar struggles!!

4:25 PM

Blogger kddub said...

kricketd~ what do you mean, yuck? Have you tried the cinnamon ones, I like those. My dad gave the boys each their own pack of the fruit ones..... anyways.... "replacing the lies with truth" that is an awesome way to put it. I will listen to Phil's sermon when I get the cd. I think this topic has been coming up a lot for me... maybe I am needing to learn something, and glad that I can learn from what you've learned too!

Larissa~ I agree, I am sure everyone does this in some form or another, just assuming what someone is thinking or feeling, and then listening to them with a filter in their ear that they put there themselves. It is good to know that I am not the only one too.

8:51 PM

Blogger Grace said...

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12:30 PM

Blogger Grace said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

12:31 PM

Blogger Grace said...

What a wonderful post! I love your spiritual post just as much as your parenting ones. I can always related to some level with you even if it doesn't directly relate to the exact situation. I can apply this to other areas in my life. Thank you for another great post!

12:49 PM

Blogger kddub said...

Grace, thank you! I am glad that you can relate as well.

9:30 PM


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